You should be using more stories

i’m 99% sure you didn’t even realize I was there, but I overheard you talking to your friend the other day. I recognized you from your pic. 🙈

Is that weird?

I couldn’t help but notice how many stories you told in the few minutes I was sitting there.

Pretty much everything that came out of your mouth was a story.

Even when you were trying to give her advice about that bullshit she was laying on you.

You wrapped it up into a nice little story.

Shit was natural and smoooooth.

I was impressed.

Why don’t you do that on social media tho?

[please don’t email me back and ask me if I really overheard you. get your life together.]

Fuck this. I got your attention now. I’m just gonna segue into what I wanted to say:

I talk a lot of shit about pretty accounts — and the dumb, harmful, ineffectual ways people use social media.

And as an alternative, I present ideas like using Unedited Talking Videos to treat your imposter syndrome and deep-seated fear about being found out.

And good ‘ol Damaging Admissions. That is, disclosing “bad” things to humanize yourself.

And using lots of social proof and testimonials.

All that good shit.

But underneath it all, being effective on social media comes down to telling stories to create (and deepen) conversations.

Thereby building a connection.


Not exactly.

I don’t need to tell you that Stories are hands-down the most effective way to connect with others, deliver a message, and spread ideas.

You’ve read those books.

And seen those TED Talks.

You have intimate experience with it every day.

So much so that you don’t even think about it. It just runs in the background.

Just like that conversation I overheard between you and your friend.

Totally fucking natural.

And if you were to pay attention to what you’re saying in those moments when you’re not thinking – rarely is it the most important information you could be sharing.

More likely: gossip.

But it’s almost always couched in a story.

But then we get on social media and start thinking too much. And the whole shit gets fucked up.

We end up trying to IMPRESS people.

Not connect with them.

And to make matters worse, we’re fucking trying to impress people that we don’t even know.

If we’re honest, we don’t even like most of those shitbirds.

Basically, we’re weird as fuck.

But you want to make shit happen with social media, your goal should be to create conversations to build meaningful relationships.

I assume we’re on the same page with that.



But I still get shit tons of questions from people about how to do it.

About how to use stories.

Which ones. How often. How long. 

I get that the concept is a little abstract, and we have so many fucking stories, it can be overwhelming even figuring out where to start.

There’s no perfect place to start.

But I do have a way to think about Stories that might make it easier.

The key is in the way that Friends titled their episodes:

  • “The One with the Thumb”
  • “The One with George Stephanopoulos”
  • “The One with the East German Laundry Detergent”
  • “The One with the Butt”
  • “The One with the Blackout”
  • “The One Where Nana Dies Twice”
  • “The One Where Underdog Gets Away”
  • “The One with the Monkey”
  • “The One with Mrs. Bing”
  • “The One with the Dozen Lasagnas”
  • “The One with the Boobies”
  • “The One with the Candy Hearts”
  • “The One with the Stoned Guy”

That shit is money.

It’s a great model and constraint for thinking about “small, self-contained incidents.”

Check this quote out from William Zinsser:

“Write about small, self-contained incidents that are still vivid in your memory. If you remember them, it’s because they contain a larger truth that your readers will recognize in their own lives. Think small and you’ll wind up finding the big themes [in your family saga].”

― William Zinsser

So if you ever wonder like “what stories should I tell? I have so many.”

A good place to start would be the small, self-contained incidents that are still vivid in your memory.

Cuz you’ll be able to give it a Friends-like title:

“The one where ________”

“The one with ________”

“That one about ________”

the one where {first_name} had toilet paper hanging out of her leggings when she taught yoga.

the one where Jerry accidentally posted a dick pic on Facebook

“The one where ___________ went to ________ and _________”

Within those “small, self-contained incidents,” you can pack-in as much backstory as is necessary to take it from Point A to Point B.

Even if you don’t quite see how one particular story fits into your grand vision of what you’re trying to do — the simple fact that you can put this sort of wrapper around it will get you somewhere.

Shit works. Try it out.


PS – “The One Where Ryan Lets People Sign-up For MoneyMoves” is coming soon.

It goes deep on all this shit. It’s taken me a long time because what was supposed to be a quick video turned into this massive project. It’s done, though. And it’s bomb.

I’m mostly futzing around with some little detail shit, but if you wanna get in early on it – hit up

PPS – if you took the CrackFriday offer, you got the fucking steal of the century. (you get MoneyMoves. And you’ll get it early.)

PPPS – also, no I didn’t overhear you. I’m fucking with you. And you kinda should be ashamed of yourself right now. ngl.

PPPPS – I been killin it on insta, per usual.


It Might Get Strange

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