FAIL 🤦🏻‍♂️

my first attempt at advertising was an abysmal failure. shit is kind of embarrassing.

but I didn’t know wtf I was doing. I was 21 years old and freshly fired from my job as a personal trainer at Lifetime Fitness.

(I refused to clean equipment when I wasn’t with clients. Like, eat shit, fuckface.. go get one of the minimum wage kids to do it. 💅🏼)

…it was a blessing in disguise, though. That firing forced me to start my own shit, and I took the few clients I had and began training them in their homes.

Which may or may not have ruined a marriage or four. 🤦🏻‍♂️ (“HEY MAN, SHE CAME ON TO ME!”) [they did. 😇]

Bad decisions aside, the travelin’ trainer schedule was just too much to manage.

Driving all over town, dragging a fucking bench and a set of 50lb. PowerBlocks into and out of peoples homes all night sucked.

So I was like “fuck this.”

I made a crappy flyer and printed thousands of them with my Mom’s printer.(def using her ink cartridges)

And I went about the business of papering the entire town of Tinley Park, IL.

Doorknobs and windshields, baby.

All of them.

One person called me.

Seriously… ONE.

Out of fucking thousands.

That’s like a fucking .0001% conversion?

Not good. Not good at all.

Her name is Cathy.

I trained her in my Mom’s garage for $30 per hour. (my Dad used to come out there in the middle of a session, in his robe, to get cans of Pepsi ’n shit. 🤦🏻‍♂️)

But whatever. The shitty squat rack and dumbbells still worked.

She got the results she wanted.

Then she brought a friend.

And that friend referred two friends.

And they were all referring more and more… so eventually, I took the Original Three and said:

“you guys should go get certified so you can get insurance and start training these people yourselves. I’ll rent a warehouse, fill it with equipment, and show you how to do it.”

(I was never certified to be a personal trainer. Not for a fucking day. No one ever asked.)

Didn’t stop me from changing the lives of hundreds of people and eventually hiring and training other trainers and opening a gym called Fit Happens.

I didn’t know I wasn’t supposed to do that.

My advertising fucking sucked, for sure, though.

I just didn’t know what else to do. 🤷🏻‍♂️

So I kept on with the flyers, every damn day, until Cathy finally called.

Then I focused intently on her and got her what she wanted because I intuitively understood that if her body changed, she would become my advertising.

As an aside, that’s seriously one of the best things about offering a service that changes someone’s body composition:  they are fucking WALKING BILLBOARDS.

But a few months later – after I started paying rent and payroll, I realized I didn’t want to be relying on referrals anymore.

I don’t like not being able to control the money. Or the intake of new clients.

I wanted to be able to get them when I wanted them.

So one night, I googled “marketing.”

And I started studying. And buying courses. And books. And seminars and DVDs. And everything I could get my hands on.

I didn’t know shit, but I was sharing what I was learning on Twitter. (before it was popular and noisy)

Valerie Waters saw one of my tweets. (she was in fitness magazines training celebrities ’n shit every month, so I was like “damn!”)

A month later, I sold my gym and moved to LA to do all of Valerie’s marketing and product development… I was in way fucking over my head.

Figured it out though.

Did that for five years along with a whole bunch of consulting.

Valerie was the one who introduced me to yoga.

Which led to me becoming a yoga teacher.

And eventually, The Best Yoga Teacher in The World.

And Yoga Sex Rock God.

And soon, the President of the United States of Rymerica.


PS – this is Day 18 of #30daysofthesefuckingemails, Round 2. There’s a bunch more at

PPS – if you’re not already in Rabbit Hole – you will want to be on the waiting list, for sure.

Trust me.

Something is happening.

PPPS – you should get this $5 video about how to make a simple video product with your phone and YouTube.

Too many people are buying it now, so imma have to raise the price soon.

I could double that revenue by just making it $10.

that all you got? c’mon..

This question comes up all the fucking time, and I just figured fuck it, imma drink some beers and write about it.

(which is one of my writing secrets: get drunk and let ‘em fuckin have it. sometimes.)

“how do you decide what to give away for free and what to sell?”

Here’s a good rule of thumb:

If we’re talking about content and things to post on the internet… to get customers, members, support, students, clients, etc.



Why the fuck are you being so stingy?

You’re not exactly holding on to the cure for cancer or some patent that will keep your family fed for generations… (and if you are, WTF! GIVE IT UP!)

I’m talking about your best shit.

Your most closely guarded secrets and techniques and exercises and methods and tricks and tips.

Give it all away.

Don’t hold a fucking thing back.

Wow them.

Fucking DELIGHT them.

Make them think:

“holy fucking shit, if I get this for free – what do I get when I give Espi some money?!”

The simple fact is this… no matter how good the free shit is, it will never get them as far as you can take them after they do the most important thing:  FUCKING PAY YOU.

The very act of them exchanging money for value is what will create the relationship that you’ll REALLY be able to help.

It’s not about the god damn information.

They have to pay you before the things you’re teaching them will have an appreciable impact.

It’s some nature/physics/universe shit that we can’t control.

You hippie motherfuckers might call it an “energy exchange.”

Whatever you call it – it’s gotta happen.


I’m not suggesting that you give away your time… like, teaching shit tons of free classes and doing client work for no money…. just out of the goodness of your god damn heart.

(although there could also be a reason to do this. I taught my 6AM Burn Yoga class for free FOR A MONTH… just to collect email addresses so that I could promote a membership to that very class. It worked like a motherfucker. But most people fuck this up so I wouldn’t recommend you do it unless you talk to me first.)

I’m talking about content.

And social media.

And emails etc

Give it away, baby.

It forces you to come up with new shit.

And you can stop fucking thinking about it and being all frozen in indecision.

Cuz let’s be real, Espi – you know you’re not doing shit right now because you’re overthinking.

You’re trying to figure out what the fuck to do and sell and create.

Just start pouring it out and see what happens.

Pretend everyone in your Instagram following and email list gave you $10,000.


Here’s what will happen:

Eventually, people will COME TO YOU and ask for your help.

Very different than you trying to sell them like everyone else.

No matter how much you give them, they’re going to need more help to apply it to their own specific circumstances.

You can’t give away too much.

No matter how much I put into these emails… and how much I give away on Instagram… there’s no way I can help you as much as you being closer to me inside Rabbit Hole.

It just isn’t possible.

So there is no fucking reason whatsoever for me to hold back here.

So I don’t.

But here’s what I know:

You’re stuck.

You get fucking unstuck by providing as much god damn value as you can.

Stop trying to determine what’s the best thing to give away.


Show us what the fuck you got.

In fact, hit me back on this email… what’s the best fucking thing you can teach someone?  Teach that shit to me right fucking now.

Click reply.

Teach me some shit.

I’m fucking serious.


PS – this is Day 17 (I think) of #30daysofthesefuckingemails, there are a bunch more at

PPS – you want to be on the Rabbit Hole waiting list. Trust me. We’re about to go DeepAF™

RE: unsolicited but idgaf

This will work fucking IMMEDIATELY if you do it. Faster than anything else I know of… it legit takes like less than 2 minutes to start.

You gotta get rid of the assholes that make you feel shitty on social media. Those bullshirt-artist chodes you always compare yourself too.

Some of them might even be your “friends.”

I know you may feel guilty about it, but seriously… they’re getting in your way.

You gotta get rid of em.





Start with anyone who meets these criteria:

  • People who just post photos professional photos of themselves… Whether it’s fucking yoga or some bullshit “lifestyle brand.”
  • Or flexing their fucking mobility training.
  • Or anyone who doesn’t have a video of themselves JUST FUCKING TALKING. On their page. (Not their god damn stories.)
  • Or if they make you feel like shit.
  • Or if you start comparing your circumstances to the fucking bullshit they show you.
  • Or you start believing that they fucking know ANYTHING AT ALL.
  • Or if you think you need to be like them to do something.
  • Or if you’re not selling something because you think people will compare you to them.
  • Or if you click their page and all of their photos are literally just them. Like.. modeling or whatever the fuck they call it.


Stop comparing yourself to their fucking fantasy.

That’s their best angle of their best rep on their best day and they probably still fucking cheated.


Don’t feel guilty.

Fuck your guilt. And fuck them too.

They don’t give a fuck about you.

They literally just fucking click ‘Like’ on their comments and don’t respond.

They can eat fucking dicks.


Focus on your own shit.

You’re missing a huge opportunity with social media if you let these fucking cockgobblers get in your way.,




Even if you think they’re your friends. DROP THEIR ASS RIGHT FUCKING NOW.

It’ll change your life.


PS – Here’s a Lifehack video I made about this very topic. Share it with your friends.


And here’s another god damn genius video I posted today. It’s called “how to make money and help people by using that universal “uninspired” feeling you’re feeling. show people that you are overcoming it and they’ll ask you for help. 🤷🏻‍♂️”


PPS – this is like Day 16 of #30daysofthesefuckingemails, Round 2. A bunch more are at


Dude, fuck July.

My mom died a couple of years ago in July, and now I have this shitty feeling about the whole month.

It’s hippy shit, for sure, and I’ll probably get over it eventually…  but it’s there. The daily fucking reminder.

It was actually 2 years ago, todayish, that I made my final trip home for her last few days.

(it was fucking bad cancer. Ovarian-ish. She was 58 and diagnosed a year prior. That shit ravaged her. I will feel guilty forever for not having been in a position to be able to travel freely to be with her. NEVER FUCKING AGAIN.)

And to make this email a little more awkward and morbid:  intuition tells me I’ll experience a similar diagnosis and fate.

And that mother fucking clock keeps ticking faster and faster and louder and louder.

But check this shit out. I have a sweet idea:

Before the day comes, I’m for sure going to queue up like three years worth of emails to keep going out a couple of times each week… and maybe even a bunch of social media posts.

May as well troll the fuck out of some ashtanga teachers and make a little money while I’m dead, right?

Ain’t gonna have shit else to do.


“bro… fuuuuuuck. I died yesterday. Fucking trippy.”


“damn… it’s been like a week since I took that ride. It’s actually P chill… at least now I don’t have to wake up and do fucking CARs every day.”


“Hey @davidrobsonyoga, you fucking cock-smoker, I’m dead… but I’m still here to fuck your world up. Why do you keep ‘adjusting’ those people? I told you to stop posting that shit on Instagram. I will HAUNT YOU FOREVER. MUAHAHAHAHAHA”


“damn bro, I’ve been dead for like six months now. Crazy shit. Seems like you’re getting on without me, though.. so good for you… ya fuckin’ ASSHOLE. 😂

You could even have links in that shit to sell products and have the money be deposited into your kids accounts n shit.

I’m just sayin’… may as well get that Cemetery Money.

I sure as fuck ain’t gonna stop pitching you just cuz I’m dead.

What the hell kind of excuse would that be?

Shit, I could even remove the Unsubscribe links… CUZ WTF YOU GONNA DO?!  REPORT ME?!

Anyway… call your Mom, dick.



PS – but fuck, you’re still alive… you may as well watch this video I posted on Insta today.

If you’re not making money, it has nothing to do with your “brand” or brandING. ⠀ That brand-centric approach is holding you back. ⠀ And it’s surely rippling out of your social media and business into your personality and day-to-day life. ⠀ Do this for 6 months. And then keep going. ⠀ ⌐ ⠀‣ Share what you’re working on. ⠀‣ Make your content uglier. ⠀⠀⠀aesthetically and metaphorically. ⠀‣ Promote your stuff. ⠀‣ Be a cool person and respond ⠀⠀to comments. ⠀‣ Make videos, send emails, and ⠀⠀write like you talk. ⠀‣ Help people for free. ⠀‣ Help people more for money. ⌙ ⠀ And whatever you do, don’t worry about your stupid logo. ⠀ #randomtalkingvideo ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀My emails are better than ⠀⠀⠀my instagram. ⠀ ⠀

A post shared by Ryan Orrico (@ryanorrico) on

Shit’s fucking GOLD.

It’s about why your ‘brand’ doesn’t mean a motherfucking thing if it’s not fueled by execution of direct marketing and sales principles.

PPS – I’m giving away lots of free shit without pitching now cuz I’m gearing up to pitch you soon.

PPPS – this is Day 15 of #30daysofthesefuckingemails… there’s a shit ton of them up on


you might already know this, but imma let you in on a little secret:

the more people you help, and the more people who know your name, the more some people are gonna dedicate time to tripping you up and fucking your shit up.

it’s like a GD law of nature.

they’re gonna talk shit.

and test you.

and fucking rag on the people who are using your methods and teaching.

so while you may be making a little more money and all that shit… you’re gonna have all sorts of new problems.

you gotta decide if it’s something you really wanna do.

cuz maybe it’s not..?

I know you think you’re ready for it…

… but you’re fucking not.

not yet.

you DEFINITELY need thicker skin.

wayyyyy thicker than that ‘lil soft ass shit you got right now.


Keep going, and rah-rah, and go team go, and all that shit, but be ready, baby … cuz it’s real as fuck.


PS – this is day 14 of #30daysofthesefuckingemails. a bunch of my shit is up at


Seriously, I don’t have time for your shit.

You just whine and complain and you never do anything.

You legit stare at your phone ALL FUCKING DAY and compare your life to the fantasyland bullshit all those clowns are posting.


And you still don’t fucking do anything.

Like you were gonna make that post last week about that thing, and you didn’t.

Cuz you got scared.


Or what was it… you weren’t ‘motivated?’



Who the fuck is ‘motivated’ just because? I mean wtf are you even talking about?

Hate to break it to ya, honey – but you gotta create that shit. You don’t just get to be motivated just because you’re fuckin’ Espi.

You fuckin’ crack me up. 😂🤣

You have like 8,000 unpublished RTV’s in your phone right now.

I mean, fuck, I got better shit to do than show up for your lame ass if you’re just gonna be all salty.

Who the fuck convinced you that you needed me anyway?

I go where the party is, baby… so if you need me, start something.

Mayyyyybe I’ll cruise by.

-Your “INSPIRATION” (you fuckin hippie)

PS – it was supposed to say “Your ‘Inspiration'” in the Name field when you checked your email… I hope that motherfucker worked. Also, this is Day 13 of #30daysofthesefuckingemails. There are more on

PPS – I’ll sell you something soon. It will be fantastic. You will want it because it will help you.

But until then, I’ll just keep bringing that fire. For free.

(if you emailed me back the other day on “what’s stopping you?,” i’m still replying. Imma get back. But I also still want responses… so if you’ve been sitting on it – send that shit.)

RE: this worked

about a month after I started #randomtalkingvideo, I got a message from a woman named Shani.

Actually, it was a bunch of messages. Long ones.

She gave me the rundown of her story and asked me if I could help her.

The help she was asking for didn’t exactly fall into a real category. She just had a sense that I knew something she wanted to know.

I didn’t know what I was selling, or how much it should cost, or what to call it, or anything really.

So I said

“I’ll tell you what, I’ll sell you five hours of free-style, figure-it-the-fuck-out-together consulting. At a discount. Because this will be experimental for both of us.”

(really, it wasn’t ‘experimental’ at all. I knew what the fuck I was doing… but the immensity of putting a wrapper on it overwhelmed me. So I just didn’t.)

But, I worked with what I did know – at the time, when someone asked about marketing consulting, i could quote them a figure for a project. I didn’t even do hourly consulting, but I had retainer clients and projects.

And when someone wanted to sit down and “pick my brain,” it was $250 for an hour. (it’s wayyy more now.)

I told her it would be $100 and she would buy five.

“PayPal me $500 and we’ll figure this shit out together.”

We would talk on the phone and come up with a plan… then she would execute.

Then we’d talk the next week, and we’d talk about what happened and what to do next.

And so on.  (you can read what she ended up saying at the bottom of this email)

(I didn’t have a name for this project until I got my second client.. right after I started calling myself Yoga Sex Rock God. Her name is Courtenay. She gave me the idea to call it “Backstage Pass.” Then a whole bunch of other people (your heroes) joined and it turned into this crazy thing.)

But here’s how it unfolded in the beginning – before I even knew what the hell it was:

I attracted Shani by posting things that she connected with.

And things that helped her.

RTV, for example… that shit changed her life. (again, read her message at the bottom of this email)

She was the first RTV I reposted, actually.

I DEMONSTRATED that I could help her. I gave her a tool that she used and it worked. (as well as a bunch of other fucking rad, inspiring shit that you see me steady posting on Instagram)

When she sent me the message requesting help, I didn’t have a product for her. I didn’t have a fancy title. Or even an offer.

I didn’t even know what the fuck I was selling.

I just knew I could help, so I said: “fuck it, let’s figure it out.”

Now, this isn’t the most scaleable venture ever, and it probably won’t get you to your first milly.

But it’s a god damn great place to start.

Help someone solve a problem and make their life better.

But first, show them you can help them. Post cool, helpful shit again and again and again.

For free.

When they reply, ask them questions in comments/DM. Pay attention to them.

Start conversations.

Eventually, you’ll be in a position to take that relationship to the next level.

And the solution you’re going to be giving them is probably an amalgamation of a whole the shit you’re interested in right now…

Different methods and principles and techniques and ideas all blended up into this fucking sick formula that no one else can create.

It’s hard to put a wrapper on shit like that.

Sell it fucking anyway.

You’ll figure it out.

(here’s how you stand out on social media [an RTV from today])


PS – this is Day… fuck, I think.. 12? of #30daysofthesefuckingemails. A shit ton of them are up on

PPS – here’s what Shani said:  (🔈 you can listen to her read it here)

“I’d scroll Instagram for hours and look at all the pretty yoga pictures.

I was bitter and angry and filled with resentment.”

“… And then this guy started appearing in my Instagram feed.

He was a yoga teacher, and he was shattering every fucking illusion about being a yoga teacher that there is out there and I LOVED IT. I was an instant fan.

He started making these “random talking videos.” And he was encouraging other people to make them too.

The “rules” were as follows:

Look at the camera and talk about something random for a full sixty seconds. Don’t stage it and try to do it in one take.

That’s it.

I was so intrigued.

I reached out to the guy in a DM and basically said, “I want to do this, but HOWWWWWWWWW?”

His response, “Just be you.”

Wait. What?

Just be me?

I’m a disaster.

I’ve hurt countless people, and I’ve let countless people down.

He kept encouraging me: “Just be you. You’re going to be a hero.”

So I did it.

And then I talked to that guy on the phone; his name is RyanOrrico.

He gave me some great advice, and I knew he could help me get on track.

And then I gave him some money.

And I continued to make Random Talking Videos, and everything started to change.

Ryan suggested I start sending emails again.

WHAT! E-mail!! That’s so 1990-something.

“Just do it!” he kept telling me.

“No fancy graphics, no fancy picture, no fancy newsletter. Just start sending emails again.”

So I did.

So I am.

It’s working.

My group class attendance has increased. I have gained several new private clients. I’ve created successful events at my private studio. I’m selling Witchy Goddess products. And my creativity level is through the roof.

Nothing can kill my vibe right now.”


why aren’t you doing this tho?

I posted this shit on insta earlier today and I was wondering why you aren’t already doing it?

It’s fucking legit.

It’s my fool-proof method for making money with a small social media audience – even if no one has ever heard of you.

Ryan Fitz said “You consistently model giving away your best shit for free. This is classic ninth limb stuff.”

Here’s how it works.

You just gotta do two things.

1. Demonstrate that you can help people by actually helping them.

2. Give a shit about them.



Fucking mind blown right?!

Here’s how you do it:

Post really valuable stuff that helps people solve problems.

Movement-related problems, fitness-related problems, nutrition-related problems, money-related problems, beauty-related problems, status-related problems, business-related problems, relationship-related problems, etc.

Smack them across their fucking face with your best god damn techniques and methods and ideas.

And don’t pitch.

Just give away cool shit and respond to people when they comment. (AKA “actually giving a fuck” as opposed to just pretending to give a fuck and ignoring them)

Keep doing that for a while.

Don’t just reply with fucking emojis.

And definitely don’t just Like their damn comment.

Start conversations.

Eventually, you’ll be in a position to get them to pay you for something… and you can take the next step with DMs or emails.

I don’t know how long it will take you to get to that point…

But I do know this:

I could legit take any fucking body who knows how to help someone solve a very specific problem – and do this for like two weeks and they’d make money.

Guaranteed. No doubt in my fucking mind.

If they already have an audience, I wouldn’t even need to spend a dime.

If they don’t have an audience, we’d have to spend a little bit of money to Promote/Boost the content.

I’m definitely not saying this would be easy.

In fact, I’m saying it’s fucking hard.

But as I try to remind myself all fucking day long:  it’s way better that it’s hard because that weeds out 99.9% of the competition.

No one is willing to actually fucking do it.

You are though… right?

I mean, why the hell haven’t you already done this?

It’s not like it’s some groundbreaking shit.

Are you just stuck? or what?

What do you think is stopping you?  Any ideas?

Hit me back. I’m curious. Reply to this email

Maybe I can help.


PS – this is Day 11 of the #30daysofthesefuckingemails. I think. There are a bunch more on

PPS – I posted a couple of other things on Insta today that you should see too.

How to build confidence

How to build confidence #randomtalkingvideo

A post shared by Ryan Orrico (@ryanorrico) on

Why the fuck is your account private?


I heard you don’t like this

so I was talking to whatshisname, and he was talking shit about you.

he was saying that you’re just pretending.

and something about you ‘not liking marketing.’

that you just want to help… you just want to show up and do the thing you’re “passionate” about and not do that gross marketing thing.

He even used air quotes when he said “passionate.”

Dude was going in.

That’s cute, though.

But you do know what means, don’t you?

It means that you ain’t shit.

I know, I know. I get it. You think using persuasive techniques and pressure to get someone to pay you for your help is wrong…

… and that posting testimonials and the things people said about you is ‘narcissistic.’

That’s nice.

But guess what that means…?

YUP! you ain’t shit, baby.

And seriously, Espi – I can relate:

You think sending lots of emails is annoying.

And ‘no one reads them.’

And that you want to look ‘professional’ so sending ‘ugly’ text-only emails won’t work for you and your business.

… oh, and what’s that you say?

He didn’t tell me you said that?!

You don’t like making videos of yourself talking about the shit you love to talk about and then posting them on the internet – flaws and all?


That’s so adorable.


I think you know where this is going now.


You just talk.

You’re unwilling to do the stuff that makes you uncomfortable.

And you’re perfectly willing to just fucking sit there.

Here’s what I know:

You know how to do things that other people don’t.

And you can help them.

That shit is on you.

You decided to get into that game, and now it’s your moral obligation to fucking deliver.

And that means sometimes you gotta do shit you don’t like to do to get people to take action.

It’s just the fucking facts.

You know damn well you can’t just give it away.

And even if you could, no one does anything with free advice… so it’s fucking pointless.

Even this here email… I can sit here and fucking bang on about it, and maybe get a few laughs… but if you haven’t already decided on your own to do the damn thing, it’s not gonna get you to do shit.

So for their own benefit, you have to make them pay for your stuff.

And if you don’t…


… you ain’t shit.

Stop calling yourself whatever the fuck you call yourself and go do something else.

You don’t have the heart for it.

And that’s totally cool.

There’s no shame in folding. 🤷🏻‍♂️

I posted some cool shit on Insta today:

This is why your Insta isn’t making you money


PS – check these out. dude sent me this email about Rabbit Hole.

“ I wanted to say that I thought of Rabbit Hole today because I went on the first date I’ve gone on since starting RH, and my confidence was on another level. It was so high it surprised me. The talking videos, writing prompts, and other projects have felt pretty easy for me so far because I’m a performer, but I now realize that they’ve still had a huge impact on my confidence because they’ve gotten me narrowly focused at all times on what my goals are, what makes me awesome, why people should give a shit, and why I don’t care if some of them don’t.Not only that, but I’ve become so busy with new projects because of RH that I never have to worry about running out of stuff to talk about on dates lol. Thanks for this.”

PPS – and Jade Electra sent me this:

“I saw some shit you said about big accounts not making money, and it pissed me off because it was true. That’s why I respect the fuck out of you. Because you say what no one else will. And you do it in this visceral way that makes people fucking wake up. Ive been wanting to tell you this because it’s the most badass thing to me.

But I’ve had to struggle through charging people money for the deep change I impact their lives with. They, in turn, struggledpaying me what little I requested because I struggled with charging it.

And then I started paying attention to everything that you are. And BAM. I began an online community and in 2 days made $5,000.

All from just paying attention to what first rubbed the spots I didn’t want to look at.

So ya. You are so much more than a yoga teacher. People won’t have a clue what they are looking at. But to the ones that figure it out: as my old boss used to say – all boats rise with the tide. And you are the damn tide.”

(this is Day 9 of #30daysofthesefuckingemails, Round 2. There are a bunch more of my emails up at

you’re a dick

I can be kind of a dick, I know.

Especially to assholes on the internet:  dangerous ashtanga yoga teachers, loud mouth tools, anonymous trolls, etc., etc.

But holy shit.

If I were half as mean to them as I am to myself all day, every day, I’d be the most hated man on the internet.

There would be no redemption.

And nothing left in my wake.

Dreams, self-esteem, belief – fucking shattered.

All that would remain is a trail of carnage and destruction.

Shiiiiiiit – I gotta give myself some props for still getting shit done.

But it’s holding me back, for sure.

One of the things I miss most about teaching regular yoga classes is those were times that I was almost guaranteed to be out of my head for small bouts… being in the same room with a bunch of other people and paying more attention to their needs worked like a mf’er.

Even doing my own yoga/movement practice doesn’t get me anywhere close to that.

It doesn’t matter if I’m in a class or on my own… I’m still way the fuck in my head most of the time. Worried about how this or that looks… and beating myself up for all of my shitty habits in the past being responsible for the strength and mobility I have now.

I mean, who the fuck am I talking to?  Preaching to the choir, I know.

But yeah, fuck that, I gotta stop doing that shit. At least when I’m doing the most important thing that I do: WRITE.

Constantly hammering myself about how I can’t write for shit while i’m trying to write does not help me write.

I’m being way more conscious of it starting right fucking now.

Even when I get stuck, and the words aren’t coming, and I normally start kicking the shit out of myself.

Not doing it, goddammit.

I’m not Mr. Positive Affirmation guy, so I’m not going to be replacing it with some random ass bullshit I don’t really believe.

But I am paying way more attention.

Just in the course of writing and editing this email, I noticed that I reached my phone wayyy less than I usually do.

Maybe that’s usually how I give myself a break from myself.


Public declarations help me. So that’s what this is.

Maybe you can be a little less of a dick to yourself too?

If you want. Or don’t. IDGAF. I’m not your god damn Dad.


PS – There’s some rad shit on my IGTV channel, btw. I’m greasing it up while we get ready to launch The Ryan Orrico Show.

Go to my Insta and click that cute little TV button under my profile photo.

Or here’s my most recent: Making Yoga Great Again. 

It’s about why I started teaching yoga and how yoga will forever be referred to as BR and AF: Before Ryan and After Ryan. It’s 2m long.

And here’s my most popular:

How to Make Paragraph Breaks on Instagram

PPS – this is Day 8 of #30daysofthesefucking emails, btw. There’s a bunch more of my stuff at